I spent the morning editing my previous post because when I read it this morning, it felt choppy and redundant. Check it out again if you are interested, I think it flows better. I am trying to write in a fluid, easy to read fashion, but sometimes my thoughts come about so rapidly that I simply type. I do edit before I post, but I think when I do that I am too close to what I just wrote, so I don’t realize when things don’t flow as well. I am working on this. I want my readers to be satisfied with what I have written.
I am a little behind in my Blogging101 assignments, but a post was made that not every assignment had to be completed – only the one’s that you felt applied to your blog. I’m trying not to sweat the small stuff. I will revisit these assignments at a later date.
It has been rainy since yesterday. I love the rain – it makes for good naps. Naps are my favorite, even though it cuts into the time that I should be looking for a job. Perhaps I am depressed.
Speaking of depression, the last time I saw my psychiatrist, he asked me if I thought I was depressed. He said he didn’t think I was depressed, because I was joking with him and participating in conversation attentively, but it has caused me to pause and reassess. I’m not sure I am depressed. Part of me thinks I am and part of me thinks I am over medicated. I would love to have a little of my mania back, simply for the energy it gave me, but I don’t want the paranoia or psychosis that accompanies the mania.
I am properly medicated. I am able to function in my life. It isn’t as exciting as it once was, and that is disheartening. But, I will take feeling normal and calm over reading into everything that surrounds me. I don’t know what it would mean to have another psychotic episode and I don’t want to know, but I still want some of that manic energy and confidence. It feels like it would be the booster that I need to get my act together. But, that would be playing Russian Roulette, and I don’t want to play with my brain in that fashion. The payoff is not worth the end result of going back to the hospital.
I want to talk about something light, so I will tell you about my cat. I know, boring, another cat story. But, he is our fur baby, and like every pampered prince, my husband’s and my life seems to revolve around making him happy. He meows constantly. Always a chatter box, he voices his opinion on the slightest of details and makes it very well known when he is not pleased with a particular situation. He likes to sit outside on our balcony and as it has been raining, he has been confined inside. We heard a lot of complaints from him yesterday and today due to his displeasure. He is sleeping right now, thank goodness. The house is quiet and things are calm. Ahhhh…no meows. Music to my ears.
I am waiting to hear back from one of the temp agencies I am registered with about a possible job interview. I am crossing my fingers that the interview comes through, but when I called to check in, my contact person blew me off and I heard the receptionist actively talking to her before telling me she had stepped away from her desk. I would say that the receptionist made a mistake by not putting me on hold properly. We shall see where this opportunity goes…
I’m looking forward to a calm weekend with my husband. I know he is looking forward to having a couple days off where we can relax and just enjoy our time together. I hope it stays cloudy all weekend. The city seems to quiet down when it is rainy.
How are you all managing your Friday? I hope you all are looking forward to the weekend and can gather together with friends, or not. It always feels good to get the work week over.
Wishing you lots of respite and happy times.